Random Thoughts From The Henpecked
January 22nd, 2008 by Bill ColleyA woman at work suggested I should write. She isn’t a hen but a Blue Hen. I’ve been henpecked until I’m blue in the face so this is a try at some random thoughts. I wanted to share a You Tube video. In it an angry Hitler vents about the Cowboys-Giants game and that he just bought a 70 dollar T.O. jersey for the Super Bowl and now can’t wear it. Then he finds solace that his fantasy league team went 13 and 3 and won a championship. The English translation below the picture contains adult language in respect to the play of Eli Manning, sorry. Not appropriate for this site. Â
It’s primary season. Here are some reasons you’ll know there is a primary approaching in your state.Â
 A. John McCain is carried off campaign bus “All tied up”. McCain wins over hostile crowd with some very Houdini like impersonations. He then gets jeered in Wilmington after refusing the “London Broil” at a Vietnamese eatery. Â
B. Not to be forgotten, Mike Huckabee has himself nailed to a cross in imitation of the Lord. He then appears on stage for a jam session with Jared’s band. Later the candidate will blame his loss on an inability to play the bass guitar.Â
C. Another former Arkansas Governor, campaigning for his wife, also gets nailed.Â
D. You come home and find Fred Thompson napping on your couch.Â
E. A former Arkansas Governor is sleeping in your bed. Or so that’s his claim.Â
F. Rudy Giuliani insists his porridge is too hot. He agrees to eat the “London Broil”.Â
G. Clinton staff empties spackling compound and trowels from local hardware stores before televised debate.Â
H. Fred Thompson is endorsed by Delaware Narcoleptic Research Foundation.Â
I. Dennis Kucinich appears at a union hall for a campaign rally. Only one person attends. An excited Kucinich offers Mike Protack a cabinet level seat in gratitude. They spend an hour chatting about fantasy football, then Protack explains he already has a new job lined up.Â
J. Terry McAuliffe suggests Obama wants to keep us in the “dark” about his health plan. Obama’s staff charges the Clinton campaign with racism.Â
K. A former Arkansas Governor apologizes and asks if Obama has any sisters working on the campaign. Â
L. You see Ron Paul “all tied up” and abandoned at sea and bobbing off the coast after suggesting people “suck it up” and get back to working for a living.
 Â
More on these breaking news stories later…Â
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January 22nd, 2008 at 3:43 pm
Dear Diary,
Today I shared a dozen half-formed, and completely unfunny jokes. No one laughed, but commonsense made a snide remark. I don’t like that guy.
love, bill colley
January 22nd, 2008 at 6:39 pm
Dear Diary: I have a listener who did not think the You Tube video was funny–Imagine that !!! I bet she wears soft comfortable shoes. Maybe she should walk in high heels with pointed toes. I just wish more people would love me !!!!!
Love, Bill Colley
January 22nd, 2008 at 7:22 pm
Look at the latest ratings, Bubba. Read ‘em and weep.
January 22nd, 2008 at 9:48 pm
You know, Bill: I don’t like “commonsense,” either.
Seems like just another Ken Keasey KoolAid type…without the electricity.
Keep up the good work, Bill!
Tim
January 23rd, 2008 at 6:23 am
“Henpecked” by a “Blue Hen?” I wonder who that could be….
January 23rd, 2008 at 8:35 am
Dear Tim, I would say that for some of these clods Deliverance is a better example. From what I’ve observed you’ve got a great many people here, the establishment figures, who expect radio talk hosts should kowtow. There are a great many so called conservatives but judging by the number of them actually serving in office by a vote across the state these people simply have been a disappointment. Too much time spent believing their personal interests are also those of the public. As for the women in comfortable shoes, well, I fear hell. It’s why I maintain a lifestyle that won’t debauch others and lead them to a nasty end for eternity. Since I also believe in free will if they choose to be damned, again, it’s their choice and I’ll leave it to them. As a Christian and a Roman Catholic I’ve made a Herculean effort. In some cases it would appear to no avail.
January 23rd, 2008 at 11:21 am
Nah, I think you have it all wrong, Mr. Bill. We don’t need A-L signifying a primary is approaching…we need only listen to quasi-pundits setting neighbour against neighbour (and I’m not only referring to radio hosts but many of their callers) and you can see them mustering their armory. This time happens to be a little worse because a woman…a WOMAN…seems to stand a decent chance of winning. Heaven forfend! And the groundswell of fear is rising that the ’superior’ male might just be dictated to by the distaff side! Whoa! Not only in the home but every walk of life as they step gingerly through the next four years. Comfortable shoes or stilettos…she might step on their egos, cabernet or Coors she could have them cowering under their bars. Hell, if she chooses not to shave her legs (or anywhere else) she might even match their grizzled looks, hair for hair. You know, in all likelihood Ron Paul ‘ain’t gonna’ make it so maybe I just have to vote for Hillary just to watch and enjoy the panicked voices announcing “Madam President”!
January 23rd, 2008 at 12:01 pm
Mr. Bill: Yesterday you did it again. You insulted the people of Georgetown when you made the remark about the “toothbrush”, not the “teethbrush”. You did it approximately a month ago to the people of Williamsville. You know, you have been here only 5 months and you really have the knack of insulting us Delawareans. I have listened to your station for 20 years and have never heard such rudeness. Bill, it is NOT kowtowing, as you would call it. It is simply a talent for disagreeing with a listener without acting like a 5 year old little boy who has had his lollipop taken away from him. You do not have that talent. I have to tell you that I was in Syracuse a few weeks ago and have never seen a more depressed area . I would have called you on air to tell you about my experience, why I was there, etc. However, since I am a woman, without a womb, I am sure you would have asked about the “soft comfortable shoes”, etc. I listen to you for only one reason and that is that I hope to be listening when the “meltdown” happens. Also, could you please advise me as to where I might find the ratings that you were refering to in your post to commonsense, also known as “bubba”. I would be very interested in viewing that report. Have a wonderful day….
January 23rd, 2008 at 12:06 pm
Many of you have thrown a party or two. You may know the guest, at 2:00 A.M., when all others have left, this guest stands, swaying in your kitchen and asking if there is any more beer.
This is a universal problem. In the dark recesses of Balkanized Europe it’s kown simply by one word. Protack.
January 23rd, 2008 at 1:20 pm
My hat…and comfortable shoes…come off to you, Bucksmom! Excellent post. Perhaps Mr. Bill, with all of his related experiences, has failed…or never taken the opportunity…to learn one basic thing; the Golden Rule. I don’t imagine he will take offence at being AKA “Tank” given how he does tend to verbally drive roughshod over…and squashing…anything getting in the way of his voice. Curious, though…he either sought the position here or was invited. In any event he exercised his free will…and choice…to move and live in Delaware but I’ve yet to figure out why given he is constantly derisory towards the State, those who live here…native or incomers. But to be fair, so far as I hear, as yet he hasn’t seemed to find anywhere he talks about worth a kind word.
January 23rd, 2008 at 1:26 pm
Actually, Syracuse has no need for a toothbrush (or even a teethbrush).
All of the people with teeth have left the area- because of the depressed conditions mentioned in other posts. Unfortunately, it looks like the conditions causing the ‘Syracuse depression’ are coming to a locale near you, complements of big government.
Why would anyone want to defend: open borders, massive government spending, ever-increasing government control over our every activity, etc.
Yes, these things have been caused by Republican and Democrat alike, by the way.
From what I hear on this station, Bill is making a case against the above referenced problems.
I’m not sure about the “comfortable shoes” reference but, I am sure that we are not heading in the right direction and we probably ought to pay attention to that, wouldn’t you agree?
By the way, I’m not a resident of your fine community. However, I am interested in the betterment of it.
January 23rd, 2008 at 1:40 pm
Tell you what, Bucky, you come by and I’ll give you a big wet smack. Then we can all get along. As far as any advice all of you have about talk radio, thank you. It’s my first day. Now go tell all your liberal friends. We’ll double the ratings by spring.
January 23rd, 2008 at 2:09 pm
Again, I would like to see the “ratings”. Where are they, Mr. Bill ????? Good luck to you “Bucky” when you get your big wet smack!!!!
January 23rd, 2008 at 5:44 pm
tim13069: I can only assume that you are a friend of Mr. Bill’s from New York and listening by “streaming”. That is a good thing, that streaming!!! I really want to feel better about Bill. The reference about the comfortable shoes is that anytime Bill disagrees with a woman, he makes that statement. He was making that statement according to his internet information when he was in New York and it is indeed very old. I agree with him in that I think Hillary Clinton is a very dangerous person and I would absolutely be very upset if she were to become president of our great country. I do not care for Mr. Obama either. This is really going to be a mess this year!!! I am a registered republican. I also was a Fred supporter and am very disappointed that he dropped out of the race. It was a disappointment to me while riding through the town of Syracuse because New York is such a beautiful state!!! I went there because my grandson is an accomplished hockey player and he was playing against a rival team in Syracuse. I also had the wonderful experience of watching the Binghamton Senators versus the Manchester Monarchs. I have throughly fell in love with hockey as a sport!!! It is a shame we cannot have that in Delaware. The fan participation is awesome. Mr. Bill, I certainly wish you nothing but the best, but please can you please stop generalizing about our towns and residents when someone simply disagrees with you. Please , can you attack the person singularly, not the poor people who share the neighborhood? I love this state, it is my home. I do not care for our governor who most likely does wear soft shoes!!! Have a great day. both you Tim and Mr. Bill……
January 23rd, 2008 at 7:33 pm
Once again Mr. Bill, your comment about the “ugly butt women” was unnecessary this afternoon. I tried to be nice in my previous post, which has not yet made it to the blog section. I have since changed my mind again about you. Go ahead and again complain to your ‘boyfriends” on air about it. You are not so pretty also…..
January 23rd, 2008 at 8:55 pm
SSSSsssssmmmmmmmooooooccccchhhhhhh. Why don’t you get off your dead bottom and look it up? Or do you expect the government will do it for you? 3.3 to 5.7.
Now go ahead, squint and pucker.
January 23rd, 2008 at 9:05 pm
I do not have a dead bottom Mr. Bill–just what are you trying to tell me? Obviously you do not speak English, you rude person !!!!!!What in the world is a SMOCH? Also, what is a 3.3 to 5.7 ??? I do not squint and certainly would not pucker up to you, you overweight biker !!!!!
January 24th, 2008 at 12:01 am
You’re both right, the YouTube Hitler/Cowboy video was worth the 4 minutes and Ice Hockey is an awesome sport, carry on …
January 24th, 2008 at 8:34 am
Those figures are from a very complex system , usually needing the intellectual heft of broadcasters to understand. For example, the top stations in the Salisbury-Ocean City market are ranked in descending order. The top is generally in the 7 to 8 range, although in New York City everyone is bunched together around 4 and 5 and by fractions of a point. Because of my “heft” as an announcer and “outsized” personality I’ve assisted our station in its move from 7th into “Fat City”, number 4 and a fraction of a “portion” out of third.
January 24th, 2008 at 6:29 pm
bucksmo
You are correct! I am a FOB…friend of Bill. I am working in the Gulf Coast, doing recovery work. I stream the program on my laptop, using a Verison Air Card. I do come from upstate, NY and am here in LA because of the lack of jobs in the beautiful state of New York.
I don’t know much about hockey but I do have a few things that I won’t compromise on: abuses of our Constitution, stripping away of our Liberties, open borders, oppressive government and a couple of others.
In my opinion, anyone who is willing to ignore the constitution, allow our country to be invaded and participate in the limitation of our liberties IS the enemy regardless of his political persuasion.
As far as I can see, there is agreement (by most of those who’ve posted here) that Socialism, fanaticism, big government, environmental insanity, government abuses and the decline of our country are the enemies.
How Bill gets to a point is his doing- and his show is ‘for entertainment purposes only,’ as he always says. I am a bit more reserved and could not possibly do what Bill does day-in-day-out.
I hope that the fears that you mention are not realized. A Hillary, Obama, Edwards, Huckabee, McCain, Romney, Guliani win would be a disaster for our country.
Thompson, Hunter or Paul would be a win. But, looks like they’ve been ‘let go’.
I guess that doesn’t leave us very many options.
Tim
January 24th, 2008 at 7:07 pm
Thanks Tim…I do not know much about hockey either, really do support my 13 year old grandson though, as he is really in to it and very talented to boot!!! I did learn alot the weekend I was in NY about the rules and regs of the game and I found it very exciting. You do hail from a lovely state, but cannot say that Syracuse was very pretty. Perhaps I simply did not get a chance to see the “nice” parts. Take care now ….
January 24th, 2008 at 8:52 pm
I couldn’t make it past the first sentence. Was that even a sentence?
January 24th, 2008 at 9:45 pm
Sorry Amish–what i was saying is this: I did not know alot about hockey. I do enjoy watching the game, however. My grandson has been skating and playing since he was 3 years old. I learned alot of stuff about hockey when I was in New York that I did not know before the trip there. My grandson loves for me to see him play and I feel that he is very talented in the sport. Sorry i did not make myself clear….I do admit that was a very sorry sentence.
January 25th, 2008 at 11:14 am
BUCKSMOM, I wasn’t talking about your post. I was talking about Colley’s style of writing, it’s as if he never got past 2nd grade. See Bill write.
January 25th, 2008 at 2:42 pm
Amish I really did think you were writing about me–thanks and sorry. I do agree with you, the man is definitely NOT a writer either . I would still like to know the place(s) where we can view the ratings of the local radio stations.
January 26th, 2008 at 12:37 am
For a caveman, it’s really not that bad.
January 26th, 2008 at 9:15 am
Bucksmom, you can find the ratings here:
http://www.arbitron.com/home/ratings.htm
The markets are for Wilmington and Ocean City/Salisbury.
WGMD is listed under Ocean City/Salisbury
January 27th, 2008 at 8:26 am
John B: Thanks for the link. You are very kind to just let me know how to get the information. The rude person made a federal case out of it .